Somehow she didn't
really _have_ it. That was why she had to keep coming--constantly
reaching out for something that was not hers to keep.
When her moment had gone, she rose and walked down the aisle. It was
very hard to go away tonight. There had been all the time the fear that
what happened the night before would happen again--that she would not
see Howie, after all. That made her so tense that she was exhausted now.
And then "munitions"--and "scrap-heap." Perhaps it was because of all
this that tonight her moment had been so brief. Only for an instant
Howie's smile had brought her into life. It was gone now. It had passed.
She was so worn that when, at the door, her brother Tom stepped up to
her she was not much surprised or even angry. Tom had no business to be
following her about. She had told him that she would have to manage it
her own way--that he would have to let her alone. Now here he was
again--to trouble her, to talk to her about being brave and sane--when
he didn't _know_--when he didn't have any idea what he was talking
about! But it didn't matter--not tonight. Let him do things--get the
tickets--and all that. Even let him talk to her. That didn't matter
either.
But he talked very little. He seemed to think there was something wrong
with her.
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